Writing in the Age of Online Hate

I published my first novel in 2004, well before social media became a way for authors to connect with readers. (I also wrote it by kerosene lamp with a quill dipped in ink.) In some ways, it was a blissful time to be publishing. There was no Goodreads, no Amazon, no way to know if readers were enjoying my book or not. The height of cutting-edge self-promotion was setting up an author website, which I did, including a “contact me” link so people could e-mail me. I heard from a few readers, several high school friends, and various people with a peripheral connection who wanted to publish a book of their own. I never received anything hateful or hurtful. Were the early aughts simply a kinder, gentler time? Had society not yet become addicted to the high of anonymous hate?

Of course, there were downsides to writing in a vacuum. Before the onset of social media, there was very little I could do to promote my books. I was featured in my local paper and interviewed on a handful of TV and radio programs, but then there was nothing to do but sit back and cross my fingers. And I had no writing community then. I struggled to connect with authors in my city, most of whom were writing literary fiction while I was writing “chick lit”. It was lonely and isolating.

Social media changed all that. I’m now an active participant in marketing my work through various online platforms, and I have a large and wonderful circle of bookish friends. I’ve connected with writers and readers all over the world and have made friendships with people I’ve never even met in person. Other than the writing itself, these relationships are my favorite part of the business. But there can be a dark side to this accessibility. I’ve experienced it myself.

When I moved into the thriller space in 2017, I began to receive some unpleasant messages. I was surprised that readers felt so comfortable telling me they were offended by the swearing in my novels (the murder, apparently, was fine), or that they didn’t enjoy the ending of a book. I received a couple of complaints about my inadequate knowledge of guns, and there was one woman who messaged me after each new release to berate me for not setting the novel in Canada (where I live). I did a TV interview once (at 5:00 AM due to time zones). I was tired and nervous, but I got through it. Shortly after, I found a DM on Instagram that read: I just watched you on TV and you’re a terrible public speaker.

With each nasty message, I felt bruised—and confused. Who were these people? Why did they think it was their right to insult a perfect stranger? What did they get out of it? These missives were hurtful and annoying, but there was one e-mail that really crossed the line. It was from a man who had read The Perfect Family. He was outraged by a scene where my teenage character, Eli, goes to a skate park and sees a bunch of kids doing drugs. The writer felt I had overblown the effects of the kids smoking shatter (a concentrated form of marijuana). He then accused me of being involved in several conspiracy theories and finished off with: F**k you Karen! F**k you! You look like God-ironed Sarah Palin!

My face was hot, and my stomach churned. It felt like this man had entered my home and slapped me. It was so vicious, so ugly, and so personal. Clearly, this guy was dealing with some mental health issues but that didn’t make me feel any better. For twenty years I had been open and accessible to my readers, but now I removed the “contact me” link from my website. I felt too vulnerable. I felt afraid.

Authors are guilty of abusing the accessibility of readers and reviewers too. There are several well-known cases of authors reacting outrageously to online criticism, going so far as to track a reviewer down and even assaulting them in some cases. Most writers know that reviews are not meant for them. If you choose to read them, you’d better have thick skin. Lashing out, in any manner, is never okay.

Book cover with text: "The Haters, a novel, Robyn Harding"
“The Haters” by Robyn Harding, releasing July 2, 2024.

I recently did a bookstore event where we talked about my upcoming book The Haters. It’s about a debut author dealing with an online troll who soon infiltrates her personal life.  A lovely woman in the audience insisted that authors should be able to take “constructive criticism” so they can make their books better. I had to disagree. By the time a novel is published, it has been vetted by editors, agents, trusted beta readers, and other publishing professionals. If we absorbed every reader’s feedback, we’d be paralyzed with indecision! Our creativity would be stifled under the weight of all the advice! “But if it’s constructive,” she insisted.

If I could get offline, delete all my social media accounts, would I? Maybe… But authors are contractually obligated to promote their work these days, to utilize their platforms to grow their audience. And I love connecting with readers, meeting other authors, and learning about all the books I want to read myself. So, I will take the bad with the good.

But I won’t be sharing my e-mail address any time soon. 

Read more from Robyn Harding here.

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